Yet Another Writing Prompt

K-SOFA Means Reading the Fine Print

The following are real “consumer directions.” Please read over them and write 10 similarly inane directions. Thanks.

1. On Sears hairdryer:

"Do not use while sleeping."

2. On a bar of Dial soap:

"Directions: Use like regular soap."

3. On some Swanson frozen dinners:

"Serving suggestions: Defrost."

4. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box):

"Do not turn upside down."

5. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:

"Product will be hot after heating."

6. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:

"Do not iron clothes on body."

7. On Nytol Sleep Aid:

"Warning: May cause drowsiness."

9. On most brands of Christmas lights:

"For indoor or outdoor use only."

12. On a child's Superman costume:

"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

14. On a bottle of Palmolive Dishwashing liquid:

"Do not use on food."